Dan Haren got bored on the exercise bike and tweeted amazing thoughts about his career

While seemingly everyone in MLB is spending their offseason exercising an entire army's worth of abs via a gigantic tire, most of us are left with more mundane workout routines. Like, for example, the exercise bike - great for cardio, sure, but not the most mentally engaging activity.
Retired pitcher Dan Haren knows this all too well. Dedicated to staying in shape now that his playing days are over, Haren hopped on the bike on Monday afternoon ... until, well, his thoughts started wandering:

I'm on an exercise bike, bored, so here are some things about my baseball career that come to mind......

— dan haren (@ithrow88) January 4, 2016

Armed with honesty -- his Twitter handle is @ithrow88, after all -- and the memories of his 13-year playing career, the right-hander proceeded to tweet out a variety of thoughts both inspiring and profound. Like, for example, the constant anxiety of air travel:

There's was atleast 3-4 times I thought the team plane was gonna crash.

— dan haren (@ithrow88) January 4, 2016

Or the dedication required to succeed on the mound:

I had to take Imodium most days I pitched to plug myself up. ?

— dan haren (@ithrow88) January 4, 2016

My only superstition was to make sure I had 2 glasses of wine the night before I pitched. This ties in with the Imodium,

— dan haren (@ithrow88) January 4, 2016

Or the vagaries of the win column:

I gave up 11 runs in Toronto and got the win one time.

— dan haren (@ithrow88) January 4, 2016

Or the secrets of the trade:

It was a time for contemplation and reflection -- on victories and defeats, heroes and villains, B.J. and Melvin:

Why the hell did Bj Upton hit so many homers off me..... This probably ties into the last tweet as well. I did much better facing Melvin

— dan haren (@ithrow88) January 4, 2016

Lest you think Haren has grown soft in his retirement, though, rest assured -- he can still bring a zinger with the best of them:

When your 1st baseman is pushing 300lb's, you gotta bust your ass over. https://t.co/yFvxO2J2lJ

— dan haren (@ithrow88) January 4, 2016

His wisdom successfully dispensed, and that boring bike ride complete, he rode into the sunset they call #retiredlife.

Ok I'm done with the bike, time to go lift Bi's and tri's. #retiredlife

— dan haren (@ithrow88) January 4, 2016